The best way to sum up my relationship with this girl named Ashley would be to simply call it a living nightmare. Nearly everything you could think that could go wrong in a relationship did in the short 4 months we were together. She was arrested for fighting at a club, asked to borrow $2,000 for legal stuff to which I obliged. Then she started acting like we were married. She would scream at me for not wanting to spend the night with her, she would start fights if I wanted to go anywhere with my friends, and if I had family parties to go to she would demand that I bring her because she thought that she should be integrated into my family. The relationship was just too much, like watching a long slow train wreck. I wasn’t having any fun anymore and I could barely stand her let alone want to be in any kind of relationship. The final straw came when some of my family came to visit from the Philipines. A few of my cousins had only been back there for a few years, going to school and helpin with family. We were having this huge party for my cousin Maribela because she had ust graduated from nursing school.The day of the party happened to fall on the day of our 4 month anniversary. I explained to her how important the party was, and promised to do something with her earlier that morning or the next day. she starts going off and says that she shouldn’t have to miss her anniversary for some bitch. That was it. 4 months isn’t even a real anniversary, and to call my cousin (whom she had never met) a bitch just because her party interferred with our “anniversary.” I told her not to even worry about it. We were finished. She started going into one of her rages and actually tried to slap me. I got in my car and drove off before things could escalate any further. She called me about 100 times before I even left for the party, but I wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of causing anymore drama.12,848 Comments
My ex, Dustin, seemed to be one of the “perfect” men in the world…boy, was I wrong. I met Dustin when we started working in a home improvement store together. I was working my way through college and he was just working. I was 18 and he was 22, young I know but the stupidity of this relationship was just mind boggling to me then and still to this day.
He was definitely my type of guy and we started texting, then going to lunch together, and then hanging out after work, and then stupidly enough having sex, and then we got into a relationship. Being young we were an on and off couple and I was usually the one to break things off when we did think we needed time apart. He started talking about marriage then it was kids and how he had always dreamed about having a little sidekick (referring only to having a son). That became too much for me being so young and not wanting to give up my college degree before having children so I could provide a good life for them. So I ended things for a while.
My second year of college rolled around and by January we were a couple again and stayed that way. He witnessed my stupidity while driving and I totaled my car by crashing into a tree while he was following me (it was supposed to be going into the shop). I was hospitalized for two days and then released, at that point I lost my job because I couldn’t handle being on my feet constantly. Well, when I lost my job he quit his (living at home with his parents he could afford it). He started going through my text messages and answering my phone, going through my mail, and my FB page. Anything that was personal he went through. If we were out and someone said hello or stopped and talked to me for a moment man or woman he was barking orders at them and asking me a never ending sting of questions about them. Then he set the “ground rules”, I had to be with him from the time I woke up until I went to bed. I wasn’t allowed to have my phone unless he checked it first. And I was not allowed to do anything with any of my friends or family. At this point, I should have ended everything for good, but being young I thought that he loved me and he was just really scared after he watched my serious car wreck. Just being the over protective boyfriend, that I had had many times before. In February, he proposed to me and I finally gave in, knowing it wasn’t what I wanted but I wanted to make him happy. In March, I found out I was pregnant.
I called him and let him know the news and he refused to believe me. I literally had to take a pregnancy test with him watching. The months past and we were fighting constantly, my hormones were raging and I couldn’t keep my emotions in check which is understandable considering my state. In July, we found out that we were having a daughter. His mom, him, and my mom were in the room during the ultrasound. They also told us that there was about a 50% chance that our daughter would have down syndrome. I broke down in tears, which would be a normal reaction for anyone. What is the first thing he says to me once we leave the office, in front of our mothers? “You aren’t having a girl they’re wrong.” After both mothers explain that the doctors weren’t wrong and that the sperm actual makes up the sex of a child he went crazy. He accused me of cheating because he was “only capable of creating tough little boys”. Stupid? Trust me, I know.
The next month I went to a bigger city for a schedule two ultrasound and they let me know that my baby would not have down syndrome that the spot they found was just a build up of calcium. My boyfriend just said, “Well, if the baby comes out retarded it’s not mine.” At that point I was done, he put me into the situation that I was in and had let me know that he did by putting holes in his condoms, but like the good girl my family wanted me to be I was going to stick out for my daughter, although he made me sick at this point. We stopped having sex completely and I stayed home a lot more since I had stopped going to college because he had asked me to. I was getting depressed and not wanting to talk to anyone and a few more months roll by and I’m coping and enormous. In November, he wanted to go out clubbing with his “boys”, I told him to have a good time since I was due in a few weeks and wouldn’t expose myself or the baby to any of that. He told me that if I didn’t celebrate his birthday with him how he wanted we were finished. I, of course, stayed home. At 4 a.m. he is pounding on my door so I let him in. He proceeded to tell me he was not the father of my child and never would and a lot more things, including that he was in love with another girl who was pregnant with his baby.
I was in complete shock, I had never thought that he was cheating on me and here I was pregnant and he had gotten another girl pregnant too. It was a train wreck, my mom kicked him out and called his mom to pick him up on the front porch because she took his keys not wanting him to kill himself before she got the chance to. He then left me alone, I didn’t see or hear from him in the days to follow and I cried a lot. About 5 days later our daughter was born, no one called him or his family but he showed up the next morning some how knowing that I was there and begged me to take him back. I refused, and when I did his new girlfriend walked into my hospital room and said “I told you so” and walked back out.
The nurses and security had to remove him from my room and two months later he was trying to get full custody of my daughter. After all the evidence, he gets to see her two days a month for a total of two hours a day while in my presence and not a drop more.
My daughter is now 8 months old, his now ex-girlfriend’s baby is 5 months old and said that he was crazy controlling and possessive, which I experienced along the way as well.
Karma is a real bitch. I hate it for him, but he gets everything he deserves from it… and someone who is 10x crazier than he is.
My story actually starts at the break up. I was 22 and had been dating this girl named Rebecca for about a year. I had had a few relationships in the past, but Rebecca was the first girl I had ever felt strongly for. I could see us getting serious after a while but she started coming on way too strong. It was like as soon as we hit the one year mark, something went off in her that said that we had to start talking about moving in together, getting married and having kids. I liked her a lot, but I didn’t want to think about any of that at the moment. We were both barely out of college and I was finally on my own. I didn’t want to get that serious with my relationship then. I tried talking to her about it on several occasions. When that didn’t work, I tried telling her that we needed some space from each other. Somehow, that made her even more clingy and pushy. That very night, she showed up at my apartment with a list of do’s and don’ts for me to abide by, and actually wanted to set an official date for when my “little space issue thing” would end and we could get back to what was important. I realized at that point that nothing subtle would work. So, a few days later I called her and said that there was too much pressure for me to take and that I just wanted to call it quits. I also told her that because I felt that us being friends or anything close to that was a bad idea, that I thought we should just try to make a clean break and move on with our lives. Rebecca was banging on my door within 20 minutes, crying and screaming. I opened the door just so I didn’t piss off my new neighbors. She begged and pleaded, and tried negotiating with me, but I didn’t want to hear any of it. I hated seeing her like that, but there was also a part of me that was so sickened by her behavior, that it just reinforced my reasons for breaking up with her in the first place. When she realized that her crying wasn’t working, she switched gears and started to make sexual advances on me. I asked her repeatedly to get off of me, but she just kept groping me and trying to get me undressed. I swear I have never been more turned off by a girl in my life. At that point, I wouldn’t have slept with her if she was the last girl on earth. I wasn’t going to be stupid enough to make that mistake. We sat there in my living room, struggling with each other. She was trying to wrap herself in my arms and place my hands on her body, and I was trying to keep her as far away from me as possible. I got fed up and told her that I had an early morning meeting that I had to prepare for, and that we could meet up after my meeting to talk things out. As soon as she left, I called the building manager’s office and told him that I had an emergency and needed to move ASAP. He came down to my place and was actually super cool about the whole situation. He offered to let me relocate to another building of his in the next city over. I ended up getting an upgraded unit in a complex with a full gym and pool. I don’t know if it was karma or good luck, but whatever it was I am thankful for the chance to continue living as I chose to and not being forced into some marriage or anything.813 Comments
I was in a relationship for the better part of 7 months before I ended up having to move over 300 miles away for work. I wasn’t sure about the fate of my relationship with my girlfriend, Kristen, but decided to wait things out and get a feel for the long distance relationship, before making up my mind on whether or not it would work. When I left, Kristen was in her third year of college and couldn’t just pick up and relocate, plus I didn’t think that we were at that stage yet anyway. We knew that it might be rough, but were both optimistic. That optimism quickly faded as I realized just how dependent Kristen had become on me during our time together. She would call me as soon as she woke up, between classes, throughout the evening and then want me to hang on the phone with her until she fell asleep. I guess I hadn’t noticed because we had spent so much time together, and often slept at each others’ places. I had never spent so much time with her on the phone. Still, I tried to keep an open mind about things and attribute her nonstop calling/texting to her needing some time to adjust to me being gone. I figured things would smooth themselves out and she would be busy and happy with school and friends soon. Unfortunately, that never happened. She just wanted more and more of my time, and when I didn’t answer her calls on my cell phone she would call my work line. She got so angry anytime I made plans. Going out with a few friends for a drink meant that I would have to endure a chain of nasty text messages, followed by her calling me over and over again. One time, she got so irate over me attending a friend’s birthday party that she actually had someone (who I later found out was her cousin) leave me messages saying that she had fallen seriously ill and had to be rushed to the hospital. I called back terrified that something awful was happening, only to be greeted by her screaming and crying about me stressing her out and how she had to do desperate things just to get my attention.
I decided that night that the distance was too much and that we weren’t working. I told her the next afternoon over the phone, and then endured a full two days worth of nasty messages, voicemails with her crying, and her threatening to go out and have sex with someone to get back at me for breaking up with her. It got so bad that I didn’t even feel bad for breaking things off anymore. I never wanted to hurt the girl, if anything I really wanted to put in the effort to make it work, but there was no way that I could live day to day having to fight just because she was lonely. She refused to hear me and continued to call and message me, each time getting crazier. It was torture to even have to look at my phone because I knew there was going to be a bunch of stuff from her. I reached my breaking point and asked a friend’s girlfriend to pose as my new girl and ask her to stop trying to contact me. Immature, I know, but I had tried everything I could to break things off nicely. That idea backfired and ended up making things even worse. She actually drove down to where I was and showed up at my place. I wouldn’t let her in because I knew it would mean trouble, so she made the biggest scene you could imagine. Still, I refused to play her game. I am not sure if something finally clicked or if she just gave up, but eventually she did leave. That was a month ago and I am still nervous about walking out of my front door.2,335 Comments
I have always been really family-oriented, so I thought it was great when I started dating Bradley. He was big on family as well, and seemed like he was the perfect guy for me. He had grown up in a smaller family. It was him, his younger sister Abby, and their parents. Growing up, they did the annual family vacations, had family nights each week, and were all very close. As the kids had gotten older, their relationships with their parents had turned more into friendships, and that was the coolest thing I had ever heard. I fell right into place with the family and was so genuinely happy.
Unfortunately, somewhere between her kids’ early and mid-twenties, Bradley’s mom had lost touch with a sense of healthy relationships, and felt like she needed to always be included in everything, and I mean everything. My first taste of her crazy came about 4 months into my relationship with Brad. I had a small gathering at my place to celebrate my best friend’s birthday. She was turning 24, so we kept things pretty quiet; just friends, drinks, food and games. When Brad’s mom found out that I had hosted a party without inviting her, she cried to Bradley for over an hour and then wrote my friend a facebook message, introducing herself and inviting the girl out for drinks to celebrate her birthday. My friend was freaked out but kept things as polite as possible for my sake. Incidents like this continued to happen for the next year, with her reactions getting crazier each time. I also noticed that she became distant and would always seem sad whenever I was included in their plans. During one dinner, she actually walked out and texted Bradley that she felt ignored and unloved. She asked for him to meet her a few blocks away because she needed to talk, and then threw a fit when he said no. Brad’s dad had to leave early to take her home. Eventually, she stopped being indirect about the situation and started making it very clear that I was the problem. She would be sure to talk about how close they all were before me, and say how they weren’t now but that she was ok with it because she would always be his first love. I just bit my lip and smiled each time. I wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of knowing that she was bothering me.
The last straw came soon after New Year’s. Brad’s friend decided to plan a couple’s weekend, which actually was a part of Brad’s elaborate plan to ask me to marry him. It was supposed to be 2 days full of friends and the things I loved most, topped off with Brad proposing. It ended up going nothing like that. Brad told his mom about the plan, and instead of being excited for us, she goes nuts and posts a rant, with pictures and details of his plans on her facebook. So I ended up finding out about the entire thing days beforehand, and I got to read all about how I had forced Brad to plan this elaborate proposal and work his ass off to buy me nice things. She said every terrible thing about me that you could imagine. Then she finished it by saying that he was too good for me and that he deserved the love and care he got from her, not to settle with what he was getting from me. Bradley ended up in a huge fight with his mom, which caused tension between us and led to us slowing down. We are still together, but he feels like we need to sort out these issues before we take the next step. I just hope that things change soon before I go as crazy as her.3,794 Comments
It all started about 7 years ago, I had been married to Jason for 2 years and we had a newborn son. My middle sister moved in to go to the polytech in our city and help out with the baby.
My marriage wasn’t going too well, my husband had mental issues and I couldn’t help him with them, it was getting really bad and I had the baby to look after. I kicked Jason out after one night of him screaming and ranting and he left for two weeks to live with his mother.
One night sitting in the lounge I heard someone outside the house. It was 1 am and there were trying to get in. I was terrified and called the police. They said they were on their way. I looked out the window and it was Jason! I opened the window to ask him what he wanted and he tried to pull me out by my throat. He had never been violent before, but could be intimidating. The police arrived but refused to take him away as his name was on the lease too. Me, my son and my sister Zoe left for the Woman’s Refuge, and Jason stayed.
The next day we went back to the house as Jason was institutionalised. The whole house was completely trashed, every window was shards on the floor, all of our possessions smashed, fridge upside down. My baby was vomiting every 20 mins. I later learnt that this is what happens when baby gets anxious.
Anyway, after two weeks or so of Jason showing up and being threatening (and knowing the police wouldn’t remove him), I decided to leave and move a few hours away to the town where my Father lives as he had a property for us. My baby and Zoe and I left one day with what we could fit in the car. After about a year and a house move, it was coming up to Christmas when I got a text from Jason saying he had been sleeping with Zoe. My husband and sister had been sleeping together in my house ever since she moved in to go to polytech and help out. I confronted Zoe but she lied and said it wasn’t true. I knew it was, Zoe had always been a sneak and jealous. I took my son on a holiday back to our city while I thought of what to do.
While I was gone Zoe moved a bunch of nazi skinheads into our home and had them threaten me not to come back and get my belongings. I went to the police here, and rung the police down there but no-one would help us. We were living back in the refuge. Zoe, Jason and the skinheads were texting me night and day. Very abusive. They killed my cat and she gave away/sold/threw out everything me and my son owned. I found it impossible to get help. The Refuge did everything it could. Zoe continued harassing and stalking me for four years. She was very clever at it, always getting my number if I changed it or my new address if I moved. I had a nervous breakdown.She knew all my details, so she would do things like ring the power company and get my power switched off, or tell a gang girl that I had slept with her ‘man’ so I would end up with girls on my doorstep screaming that they would kill me, she would ring child protection and try and have my son taken off me. It happened so often that they said they would have her charged for wasting their time. Zoe didn’t care, she just started ringing anon.
It was constant and unending terror. I didn’t know what would happen next or when. I was constantly scared. I began to think that to make it stop one of us would have to die, I saw no other way, it had been years and I had called the police many times but she was very clever at not looking guilty and they didn’t know what to do.
I decided to put a stop to it once and for all. I gathered evidence of everything, I got people who had witnessed anything to write me letters stating it, I made sure that if anything new happened I had witnesses and then I made an apt with a lawyer. I eventually got a protection order and if Zoe breaks it she will go to prison. The judge was incredulous that it had gone on for so long and we had not been helped. Zoe still tries every now and then to stalk me but she is scared of prison. I have heard that she has done this to other people since then. I am relieved to be free. It’s taken a long time to get over the stress and breakdown from all of this.
I guess I wasn’t dumped, and I’m sorry that my story doesn’t really fit here. I do feel like I was dumped on.Thanks for reading, it helps to tell what happened.