The Nice Guys Really Do Finish Last

I’m not full of myself or anything like that, but I am proud to say that I am one of those nice guys everyone is always talking about. I’m 18, and still in high school, so my apologies if this story seems really juvenile compared to others you guys usually read, but I am hurting and I really just want to vent. Since sophomore year, me and this girl named Erin have dated off and on. First, we fell really hard in love and developed that co-dependent relationship that was dangerous for kids our age, so our parents made us take a break from each other. We dated again over the summer, but I broke things off because she was being really possessive and needy. She didn’t even want me to spend time with my two brothers who were home visiting from college for the summer. We tried again during winter break, but it lasted all of a few days before we just stopped talking to each other. At the beginning of this year, Erin comes up to me and hands me a letter. In it, she poured her heart out about how she never stopped loving me and wanted nothing more than to be in my arms again. I was touched, but didn’t think we were ready to jump right back into things. We dated but agreed to take it slow. Over Christmas, I made a huge deal over telling her that I had fallen in love with her again and she was so happy. That smile made me feel awesome, and all of those old feelings came back. I figured we were meant to be. It was nearly time for prom, but instead of just assuming we were going, I went all out to ask her in a big way. I got permission from our school’s administration to do a huge chalk drawing in the courtyard. I worked for 2 straight days over the weekend, literally coming in right at sunrise and working well into the night with flood lights. It was perfect and she actually got teary-eyed on Monday when I asked her. I paid for everything. I even worked overtime so that I could buy her a $300 gift certificate to a nice salon, so that she could get pampered and get her hair and nails done.

Prom night came and she looked amazing. The night started out well, but she got a little distant and disappeared after a few hours. I asked around, and found out that she was upstairs in one of the hotel rooms that some of our friends were staying in. I figured that she had gone up with her friends, so I headed upstairs to meet up with her. When I got up there, she was nowhere to be found. I sat down with a few buddies of mine, and guess who comes creeping out of the bathroom with some random guy? Yup, the “love of my life.” She immediately tries to act like she was entering the hotel room as he was exiting the bathroom and that they had just bumped into each other, but I wasn’t stupid. I had watched the both of them come out together, the room wasn’t that big. She pulls me out of the room and starts with the tears and the lies, then she says that she’s not into the relationship anymore. That was it. Basically, she pulled me back in and I fell back in love with her and then she just tossed me aside. She added insult to injury by adding the excuse that she wasn’t really looking to get serious with me but just wanted to see if she could succeed in getting back together with me. Ouch. I didn’t think we were going to get married or anything, but I still didn’t want to be played with. Now I just can’t wait to get the hell out of here. My brothers and I are all a year apart, so my oldest brother will be a junior and my middle brother will be a sophomore next year when I start college at the same school. They have promised to show me an awesome time and I have never been more excited. I have vowed not to have a girlfriend until a few years down the road. Love can wait, I’m ready to have a good time!

Dumped by an Online Ding-Dong

When I was just barely situated into high school, I had this stupid idea of getting online and chatting through people in a website. (I couldn’t tell you which one now) I met good ol’ Bryan, he had moved a few states south from where I lived, but was originally from my area. We chatted for months about all sorts of things, told me he was 17 and had a horse show to go to in my area, and that he wanted to meet me. I said that I needed to ask my parents, and he insisted on asking my mother himself. He sweet talked her until she went as far as to ask what his favorite thing to drink was and his favorite food so that we might have it for him when he came. The day came when he was supposed to meet, I had made fresh lemonade, I began making lunch, and a fresh blackberry cobbler with homemade vanilla ice cream for dessert. He said he’d be at the house at around 11:00am, but he never came. I called him and he said there was a problem with the horse trailer and that he would be a little late.

Then he called me back and told me that his little brother was going to have his tonsils taken out, so he had to go back home. After that he just dropped off the face of the earth. No more messages or calls from him. I knew he lied to me about coming to see me. I wasn’t aware of it at the time, but my mom thought he sounded older than 17. I simply chalked it up to him being a lot older than what he told me and when it came down to seeing me, he got afraid when my parents became involved. I would never think a pedophile would go to lengths as far as talking to one’s parents, but you never know. But now I feel like the ding-dong, I never cried over him-which says a lot right there- I moved on with my academics, singing in opera competitions, and loving my life out in the country.

My mother, who is very loving, still makes comments about how I have the worst taste in men. And that I need to wait for the right choice to choose me. Well, Mr. Right! Where are you?! Times a waistin’!

Gay-dar Was in the Making

When I was a freshman in high school I was suckered into dating this guy who rode my bus. He was tall dark and handsome with a great smile and big blue gem-like eyes. He was quiet and read a lot of books (like me-the reading part) His dad didn’t like me because my family was comfortable financially, and I think he loathed me.

He would talk to me and make snide comments about our newer vehicles and home (which he never saw). But, being 15, I overlooked the issue since my boyfriend’s mom loved me and treated me as if I were her own. We were together for about 3 years, during which time I noticed some oddities about my quiet companion. At first, I would have to beg him to call me. I always thought that if a boy liked you, they would call willingly. I also had a hard time getting him to hang out with me after a movie or dinner.(He would tell me he had a friend online that he promised he’d meet, in a chatroom) No big deal, I just figured he’d tell me if there was a problem. He tried to break it off with me once after 6 months, but I sweet talked him out of it. HE would hold my hand, and kiss me in public, but wouldn’t “touch” me, when I was more than willing (red flag).

I was a virgin at the time, but more than willing to lose it to someone who I thought was so perfect for me. We talked about marriage and kids after college, we would spend every holiday together and make time at both family’s houses. I thought everything was great until, DUN DUN DUN!!!(dramatic music) The day he dumped me. It was at school of all places and on our 3 year anniversary a couple months before his graduation and prom. He pulled the whole, it’s not you it’s me card. Said he couldn’t explain it, but that he just couldn’t be with me anymore.

Fast forward a year and a half, I have since graduated and began a job (working on cars on the side) when I get an email from said ex-boyfriend. It read thusly, “I don’t know how to tell you this, but I’m gay. Please don’t tell my parents, they won’t understand, but I needed to tell you.” I sat in utter shock, my mouth hanging down on the computer desk next to the keyboard. I felt an odd relief and then realization hit me that I knew all along, and so did everyone else apparently, my uncle who happens to be gay, told me he was, but blinded by love I ignored it, which was STUPID!!. Especially since my dad loved to use word play with his name, Ben. But would call him Ben-gay. Yeah, ha ha, not so funny now.

I told my parents that their assumptions were confirmed, and for the first time in my whole life, my dad didn’t have a wise-crack. The next day dad and I were working in the garage on a Standard V8 engine, tearing it down and cleaning it when I look up and I can tell my father has something on his mind. I wipe the grease off my brow and say “Alright dad, out with it.” He laughed and said,”Well, I guess your gay-dar was off wasn’t it!” We laughed and I threw my rag, hitting him square in the face. And that was that. I am still single, and looking, but my gay-dar is now in full function, and I shaln’t be tricked again.

Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater

So, the title of this may be a bit misleading, but it’s still all the same to me…
I’ll call this guy JL; I thought he was the one for me. We started dating halfway through my sophomore year, and continued to do so until about a month ago, when I ended it. Why did I do that? Well, multiple reasons. The biggest factor was that I let him get away with cheating not once, but three times. To this day, I’m not sure why. I guess I thought he loved me, and he always seemed so sorry after I found out (which, by the way, I found out from other people, never him). Him cheating on me left me with no self-esteem. I’m not the best with relationships, because I get hurt easily. But, I also made a mistake last month, and that made me realize that I deserve better, and maybe he does too. I still can’t figure out why it’s so easy to cheat on me. Maybe because they know how easily I fall for people, and just like JL, they all run all over me and my hurting heart.

Sometimes Things Work Out for the Best

Dated a girl in high school, she was 2 years younger, my senior year I asked her to go to the prom she said no. Another boy asked her and she said yes, I took the hint. He later dumped her and she came back and begged for forgiveness, that was my second year of college. She and I both the went to college in another city and we got married before my college senior year and her sophomore year. I worked that year and paid for us both to go to college (she didn’t work). After I graduated I got a great job and paid all of the bills and for her final two years of college tuition, nice house, new clothes and a new car (she did not have a car before we married). 2 months after she graduated she had an affair. She said she had paid some bills but had instead kept the money and drained our saving account. We got a divorce and I paid all the bills off. She later married the same guy and she went on to teach. I found out later that her “boyfriend/lover/husband” got muscular dystrophy and is confined to a wheel chair but will have a normal life span and she has a neurological disorder and is routinely hospitalized.
Sometimes things workout for the best!

He Stopped Trying, So I Cheated

I know that most of you probably won’t take pity on me and that I am probably going to get bashed for what I did, but until you lived a day in my shoes you shouldn’t be so quick to judge. My husband and I had been high school sweethearts. We had started dating at the beginning of junior year and got married 6 months after we graduated from college. Our first few years together were awesome. We were young, we had fun and we were in love. He played baseball and football and I was on the dance team. We went to college together and were always seen as that “it” couple who would be together forever.

A couple months after we got married, I found out that I was pregnant. We had always talked about kids and everyone was very excited for us. This is the point where we started going in opposite directions. Even though I was pregnant, I still tried to eat right and exercise. My husband on the other hand had more cravings than I did and gained just as much if not more weight than me. By the time our son was born he just looked chubby. I tried so many ways to encourage him to lose the weight but he would always fight me and say that he was happy just the way he was. I was so frustrated by the situation that I could barely stand to look at him anymore. He didn’t care about his appearance or keeping his wife happy, and I started feeling like I was falling out of love. I tried talking to him about it but he just said that if my love for him was only based on looks, then he hadn’t married the girl he fell in love with years ago. I felt like I was the same person, and that there was nothing wrong with me wanting to wake up to the same man that I fell in love with. not some fat slob.

One evening, my parents came by and offered to take our son for the night so that we could get some alone time. We decided to start the night with a movie. I went upstairs and changed into a cute little date night outfit. Halfway through getting ready, I notice that my husband is dressed and waiting for me. He has on his old jeans and sweatshirt that he wears every weekend. We ended up in a huge fight over my not wanting to go anywhere with him looking like that. That was the last straw for me. I signed up for a hook up site for married people that night. I was really just looking to get some of the attention that I was craving, but one thing led to another and I ended up having two affairs. They have both ended and my husband has no idea about either of them. I begged him over and over to put in the effort but he just didn’t care.