Control Issues Picks
My ex, Dustin, seemed to be one of the “perfect” men in the world…boy, was I wrong. I met Dustin when we started working in a home improvement store together. I was working my way through college and he was just working. I was 18 and he was 22, young I know but the stupidity of this relationship was just mind boggling to me then and still to this day.
He was definitely my type of guy and we started texting, then going to lunch together, and then hanging out after work, and then stupidly enough having sex, and then we got into a relationship. Being young we were an on and off couple and I was usually the one to break things off when we did think we needed time apart. He started talking about marriage then it was kids and how he had always dreamed about having a little sidekick (referring only to having a son). That became too much for me being so young and not wanting to give up my college degree before having children so I could provide a good life for them. So I ended things for a while.
My second year of college rolled around and by January we were a couple again and stayed that way. He witnessed my stupidity while driving and I totaled my car by crashing into a tree while he was following me (it was supposed to be going into the shop). I was hospitalized for two days and then released, at that point I lost my job because I couldn’t handle being on my feet constantly. Well, when I lost my job he quit his (living at home with his parents he could afford it). He started going through my text messages and answering my phone, going through my mail, and my FB page. Anything that was personal he went through. If we were out and someone said hello or stopped and talked to me for a moment man or woman he was barking orders at them and asking me a never ending sting of questions about them. Then he set the “ground rules”, I had to be with him from the time I woke up until I went to bed. I wasn’t allowed to have my phone unless he checked it first. And I was not allowed to do anything with any of my friends or family. At this point, I should have ended everything for good, but being young I thought that he loved me and he was just really scared after he watched my serious car wreck. Just being the over protective boyfriend, that I had had many times before. In February, he proposed to me and I finally gave in, knowing it wasn’t what I wanted but I wanted to make him happy. In March, I found out I was pregnant.
I called him and let him know the news and he refused to believe me. I literally had to take a pregnancy test with him watching. The months past and we were fighting constantly, my hormones were raging and I couldn’t keep my emotions in check which is understandable considering my state. In July, we found out that we were having a daughter. His mom, him, and my mom were in the room during the ultrasound. They also told us that there was about a 50% chance that our daughter would have down syndrome. I broke down in tears, which would be a normal reaction for anyone. What is the first thing he says to me once we leave the office, in front of our mothers? “You aren’t having a girl they’re wrong.” After both mothers explain that the doctors weren’t wrong and that the sperm actual makes up the sex of a child he went crazy. He accused me of cheating because he was “only capable of creating tough little boys”. Stupid? Trust me, I know.
The next month I went to a bigger city for a schedule two ultrasound and they let me know that my baby would not have down syndrome that the spot they found was just a build up of calcium. My boyfriend just said, “Well, if the baby comes out retarded it’s not mine.” At that point I was done, he put me into the situation that I was in and had let me know that he did by putting holes in his condoms, but like the good girl my family wanted me to be I was going to stick out for my daughter, although he made me sick at this point. We stopped having sex completely and I stayed home a lot more since I had stopped going to college because he had asked me to. I was getting depressed and not wanting to talk to anyone and a few more months roll by and I’m coping and enormous. In November, he wanted to go out clubbing with his “boys”, I told him to have a good time since I was due in a few weeks and wouldn’t expose myself or the baby to any of that. He told me that if I didn’t celebrate his birthday with him how he wanted we were finished. I, of course, stayed home. At 4 a.m. he is pounding on my door so I let him in. He proceeded to tell me he was not the father of my child and never would and a lot more things, including that he was in love with another girl who was pregnant with his baby.
I was in complete shock, I had never thought that he was cheating on me and here I was pregnant and he had gotten another girl pregnant too. It was a train wreck, my mom kicked him out and called his mom to pick him up on the front porch because she took his keys not wanting him to kill himself before she got the chance to. He then left me alone, I didn’t see or hear from him in the days to follow and I cried a lot. About 5 days later our daughter was born, no one called him or his family but he showed up the next morning some how knowing that I was there and begged me to take him back. I refused, and when I did his new girlfriend walked into my hospital room and said “I told you so” and walked back out.
The nurses and security had to remove him from my room and two months later he was trying to get full custody of my daughter. After all the evidence, he gets to see her two days a month for a total of two hours a day while in my presence and not a drop more.
My daughter is now 8 months old, his now ex-girlfriend’s baby is 5 months old and said that he was crazy controlling and possessive, which I experienced along the way as well.
Karma is a real bitch. I hate it for him, but he gets everything he deserves from it… and someone who is 10x crazier than he is.
I know these are supposed to be short and simple but this story is anything but.
I met, lets call him Orville just to be funny, in 8th grade. We were in the same friend group and hit it off. Well, as much as 7th graders can I guess. Anyways, we spent everyday, every break between classes together and were on the phone from the time we got home from school until the time we went to sleep. We dated for nine months our 7th grade year.
We broke up and stayed actually quite close. He got a new girl friend and I got a new boyfriend. He had a rough next year his girlfriend was murdered and he lost his grandma and uncle. (Now I’m not telling this because I want him to get sympathy, because what he did to me is seriously messed up.)
I was there for him through all of his hardships, whenever he needed a friend. We ended up getting back together our Freshman year in high school. And for awhile things were really good. But then I started to notice his behavior changing. We had a couple classes together and always complained that I was “up his ass” too much. In high school. You don’t choose when you have classes. He also started to talk down to me in front of his friends like I was his little puppy or something. He started to tell me what I could and could not wear, but lets be serious I never worn anything other then sweatpants in high school. He always had to know where I was, who I was talking to and why I was talking to them. Even though I wasn’t allowed to ask the same questions. and he got ANGRY. I mean one minute he would be calling me baby and telling me how much he loved me then I joke with him and he’d go off calling em every name in the book, he told me he wanted to hear me beg for him to stop yelling. We ended up breaking up because I couldn’t handle it anymore.
Fast forward, end of sophomore year. We start talking again. Things were awesome we hung out all in the same friend group things were great we spent the entire summer just hanging out. But we never actually got back together he always had some random girl he was talking to. He always told me how much he loved me how much he needed me blah blah blah. Looking back on it I was so stupid. Anyway, we talked more and more. Then he started to get rough. Up until this point he had been very very emotionally abusive. Completely tore down my self esteem. Called me fat, ugly, worthless, told me I would never amount to anything, that I would never find anyone like him. He started to hit me about 3 months into my junior year. I wasn’t allowed to be with anyone but he could do what ever he wanted. Whenever we would get into a fight he’d do something. He would hit me, slap me, he pushed me so hard I had clear hand print shaped bruises on my ribs, knocked me by pushing me into a wall, threw me across a room by just my ankles, broke my foot by stepping on it, told me if he provided the gun he’d watch me kill myself, brought a gun to my house threatening to kill me.
a real winner he is.
The worst part is that all of the people I called friends didn’t believe he didn’t any of this. Orville was perfect to all of them sweet little Orville. Even when one of them was in the room. we talked up until about 6 months into my freshman year of college. I was completely broken, to this day i dont have the self esteem I should, I dont think im good for anything, I went through a very rough time trying to find my self worth. And 4 years later I am now 21 and it took me a good 2 1/2 years to really be okay agian. My current boyfriend is amazing, and he is the first person i have told about all of the horrible thongs that went on because im finally okay to talk about it. No one should eve have to go through that, especially being so young.
Its embarrassing.3,202 Comments
I met “J” my sophomore year of college. I wasn’t initially attracted to him, but he was nice and sweet – at first. Slowly, he became more and more controlling. There were ‘rules’ I had to follow about who I talked to and when. He was taking control of my life! After he said an inappropriate comment about my mom, I broke up with him. That’s when he really became weird. He sent me this six page e-mail about how breaking up with him was not following God’s will. A few days later, he slipped a birthday card and a pamphlet about how to know God’s will under my door. He began watching my apartment and stalking me across campus. No matter where I would go he would show up and want to talk. I finally had to get the police involved. After a few months, he got another girlfriend and left me alone.615 Comments
When I was in college, I dated this guy who came from a pretty average background. He had grown up middle class, graduated with decent grades, and was attending the same state college I was going to. There was nothing “high class” about it. I mean, he carried himself well and dressed nice, but he was in no way the “fancy car, designer labels, too good for anything but the best” type, and it was for that reason that I loved him so. We spent two great years together. Going out in his dad’s old SUV on clear nights, just to lay out and stare at the stars. Then, his grandmother died. She had been ill for over a year, but took a sudden decline in health and passed away quickly. It was a hard blow to everyone. I was there for him every step of the way, then life changed forever.
His grandmother had kept it a secret as to just how much money she had. She had come from a well off family and her parents had left her money (she was the only child). Plus, her husband had owned a few successful businesses and had sold them before he retired. My boyfriend’s dad and his mother received $8 million and my boyfriend, being the only grandchild, received $2.5 million. It was like an overnight change. His parents paid off their house and bought a new truck. My boyfriend, on the other hand, bought a luxury condo in the heart of downtown, a brand new fully loaded Lexus, and a brand new very expensive wardrobe. He took me shopping and tried to outfit me in all if these tight, revealing outfits that cost way too much. I was uncomfortable the entire time. We went to get a bite to eat at some expensive restaurant and he had the audacity to tell me that I needed to change a few things in order to meet his standards. All I could do was sit there bewildered. I said that I wasn’t changing for anyone and that I was the same person with or without money. He chuckled then told me to “step it up.” He said that he wanted someone who would carry themselves by his standards, then he said he needed to find that girl. Though he did pay for my cab ride home!466 Comments
I should be planning my dream wedding right now, but because my fiance’s mother is such a psycho b*tch, I’m moving out of our place and sending everyone emails to let them know that the wedding is off. The whole mom thing has been a problem since day one. When we first started dating, it wasn’t too bad because he was still living at home. I swear, she would call him every time we were out to find out what he was doing and what time he was coming home. Even after he told her all of that, she would do things like take a picture of herself in the mirror and send it to my boyfriend with the caption “Miss and love you!” Or she would cook dinner, call to let him know she was cooking, send him a picture of the meal, then call again to see what he thought of the picture. It didn’t bother me too much. It was a little annoying with her constantly calling but whatever.
As our relationship progressed, the crazy started coming out of her. She just did immature little things to try and hurt me or create a divide between us. She would always try to guilt him into canceling plans with me so that they could do something instead. There were several times where she even played really sick and asked him to come home right away because she thought she might have to go to the hospital. Of course she never did, and she was magically better by the time he got home. She even felt well enough to ask him to go out with her to eat and catch a movie. We argued so many times about his mother’s hold over him and how badly it was affecting our relationship. Somehow, we managed to make it through and he proposed last summer. We planned our wedding for June of this year, and his mother did everything she could do to stand in the way since we announced our engagement. The stress of her constant interference and negativity got to the both of us but it really bothered me because my mom left when I was younger, so I always imagined that my mother-in-law to be could help fill that role during the whole wedding planning thing. She instead turned it into my nightmare and I ended up reaching my breaking point. I told her off in the middle of the flower shop. I told her that she better watch her nasty comments or she wouldn’t be allowed anywhere near our wedding. I said that I wasn’t going to tolerate anymore from her. She went back crying and guilt-tripping my fiance. What did he do? Nothing. He yelled and screamed at me about how I wasn’t treating his mom with respect and said that he wasn’t sure we should be getting married. And that was that. We decided to call things off and both move out of the apartment we shared. I’m not sure what will happen, but I love him with all my heart and wanted a future with him.113 Comments
Last year, I was a senior in high school and I worked at a breakfast chain restaurant which was where I met my crazy ex-boyfriend.
I only had 4 more months left of school and my life was going at full speed. I was happy and single until my ex-boyfriend started working with me. I was a hostess and he was a server. We flirted non-stop like little children then eventually, we became official.
[Worst God Damn Decision of my Life...]
My ex-boyfriend has wealthy parents. They paid for his $1,400 apartment, monthly. He’s now 21 and will be 22 within the next month, has never been to school and has trained in the marines only to drop out of training because he fails at life and just wants to wait for his parents to die so he can inherit their wealth. (not actually making that up.) ANYWAYS….
The craziness started when he told me that he loved me within 2 weeks of us being together, adding on another 2 weeks he told me that he can see within the future and said that if we “play out cards right” we would get married. Really now? Continuing on, he would eventually strip away my privacy (looked through my texts, no guy friends, I could only hang out with him only) and as a result, I lost all of my friends. All of them.
Eventually it became so bad that when I tried to end our relationship in a cordial matter, he would start yelling and screaming at me, shouting terrible untrue things about me and later on he punched a hole through his parent’s bathroom door. In addition to this bullshit, he cheated on me twice throughout our relationship but he denied it although it was blatantly obvious. The second time he cheated on me was the worst and definitely the last. He left me to be with some girl who goes to some tech school (currently lives with her) WHILE WE WERE STILL TOGETHER. Face palming it right there, literally.
HOWEVER, he was a weird freaking kid and I found a picture of him in his spandex humping a pillow with a caption saying “In it to Win it.” I sent it to everyone I knew. Revenge is sweet.1,700 Comments