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The Workshop
My husband of 13 years left me 2 months ago. There, I said it (you all have no idea how hard it is to face sometimes). I could leave the story at that, but I finally feel strong enough to share the details of how it all went down.
We got married when we were 20. Yes, it was young but we were in love and couldn’t be told otherwise. We had our son 3 years later and our daughter 2 years after that, so things kinda happened pretty fast. We were happy and we both loved our family deeply. I work as an Urgent Care Nurse and he works in graphic design. We weren’t rich, but we had enough money to cover all of our expenses and just enjoy life. We took plenty of family vacations and our children were well provided for.
A year ago, a designer friend of his asked him to help him teach a design workshop at the local community college. He agreed and they hosted the workshop on weekends for a month. Nothing seemed to really change after. He was still working every day and doing the same things around the house he always did. Soon after, he started a project working with a big design firm, so he got busier and was often working on weekends. Or so I thought…..
As it turns out, there was no project. Instead, he was spending all of that time with the 18 year old girl he met at the workshop. She was more than happy to tell me all of the disgusting details when she called me to inform me that my husband was leaving me for her. Yea, my husband had his teenage skank call me to tell me our marriage was over. He came by the following weekend and packed up his stuff. He said that he just wasn’t happy anymore and that she offered him what he had been missing for so long. I was broken, but I had to try to keep it together for the sake of my children. He has seen them once since he left, and hasn’t put a dime toward any of their expenses. The divorce process has been started and I must begin to try to give my kids some of the life they once knew.
42 Comments to The Workshop
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It’s always sad when a seemingly strong marriage dissolves for no real reason, but it happens all too often. Get a good lawyer…don’t skimp. A good lawyer can make the difference between a comfortable life for your children or constant scraping to get by. Start getting some child support ASAP. They need it, you need it, and he needs to pay it. Lastly, get some family counseling to help you and your kids deal with this blow. Your kids are going to need an outlet where they can talk about this situation without hurting your feelings by being too candid.
I am sorry. Good luck in the future.
What Carrie said.
Carrie gave you some good advice. Get the best lawyer you can–he’ll end up stuck with your legal bills since he cheated on and deserted you. You don’t need to wait for the divorce proceedings to start getting child support. Most states handle child support from their children’s service department. Make an appointment, and take any documentation of his income that you have. If you still have joint checking accounts, go close them immediately before he does. You can save half the money for him if you choose, but he won’t do that for you. He has a little gold digger to support now. Protect any assets that you have.
The worst part about all of this is that he has had a head start at hiding all of his assets. His financials will be looked at from the past few years, but there is no telling how long he has been hiding things. It’s not like he’s an upstanding guy. Sorry to be harsh here.
He’s also a pussy to have his mistress call you. That’s a chicken shit move if I ever heard of one. It’s not a wonder that he can’t look you or his children in the eyes. He has shame. He might be going thru a mid-life crisis BUT this 18 year old will grow tired of him…especially when you get half of his money, plus alimony, child support, half of his retirement, 401k, all of his/your “friends”, the respect of the community and the house.
He’ll just have an 18 year old piece of ass and a one bedroom apartment.
Good for him.
You forgot to mention in your story how you let yourself go and the never ending nagging. No man wants a sow that won’t stop squealing at them all the time.
Ugh what a selfish pig. It’s one thing to be unhappy in a marriage and say you don’t want to be with a person anymore, but quite another to cheat, not even tell the person yourself that you’re leaving and then not even see the children. That is beyond low. I seriously cannot understand how a person can have so little respect for anyone, let alone someone they have spend a significant portion of their life with. Sorry you got stuck with such a douche. I wish you and your children all the best and hope this guy gets what he deserves.
You’re right, Brattus…OP, don’t be surprised if in a year or two, your husband tries to come back. He’ll tell you he realizes he was a fool, you were the best thing that ever happened to him, and the best thing for the children will be to get back together. But, really, he will have been dumped by his young piece, invisible to other young things now that he’s come to the realization that all of his money is at your house, and wants to take back some control. Don’t fall for it!
He doens’t pay, he doesn’t visit. Until he starts paying do not let him visit his kids. Read what I just wrote,…then read it again and again and again.
And above all else…..DON\T TAKE HIM BACK!!! Once a cheat always a cheat!
Lol, I love the line about having some 18 year old ass and a one bedroom apartment. You are probably thinking to yourself OP, “What does she have that I can’t provide?” The answer is jack shit, what your husband thinks he needs cannot be found from this child that is 15 years younger than him. You are obviously a successful and talented woman as evidenced by your degree and occupation, and no doubt, a fine mother. I will add the obligatory joke about perhaps brushing up on your mouthhugging skills for future romantic encounters down the road.
OP, she doesn’t have shit on you, just so you know. She’s 18, probably has no job, let alone any sort of employable skills or anything interesting or relate-able to talk about with your douche of a husband. Her biggest talent is being able to suck a dick.
My guess is, she probably will not amount to much in life because she will be riding the coattails of your husband’s illusion of success, and after getting tired of him; she will go from successful man to successful man, probably never getting a real job. If anything, feel pity for her, because your husband has enabled this child to learn that she can get by in life by spreading her legs for a step-up on the social ladder.
Don’t take him back (and he will try to come crawling back at some point, they always do!) Obviously, you are going to have to play some hardball because he has demonstrated he doesn’t give a flying fuck about the kids. Don’t you dare feel guilty about it either, this breakup could have been handled in such a way that didn’t leave the kids high and dry. Focus on what is best for yourself and your children and good luck. We are all looking forward to hearing an update about your situation.
CHubs hit the nail on the head, most of life’s problems can be solved with solid mouthugging skills.
When this 18 year old road whore gets sick of your husband, do NOT take his sorry ass back. He will be bringing back more than just his sorry ass, I’d bet all kind of slutty cunt cooties will come with him
Take him for all he’s worth and don’t take him back.
How cowardly to have his teen skank call you. I hope the kids don’t take after dad.
I had something very similar happen to me, and the only thing I can say is, I now look back and thank that girl for doing me a favour.
You will be better off without him. Stay strong. You will be happy again in the future and will look back and think that if this didn’t happen then you wouldn’t have the amazing life you do now.
And yes, make sure he pays you what you are owed. You deserve better and you deserve to be happy, and you will be x
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