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Him and His Best Friend
2 years ago, I dated a guy who lived with his best friend. At first I thought it was cute how close they were. It was like one of those funny bromances you always see in movies. They had grown up together and had been best friends since kindergarten. Even their parents were all really close. Coming into the relationship was like transferring to a new school in the middle of the year; Everyone was already so close and you have to try to fit in somewhere. My boyfriend and I grew close and I would often stay at their place. I didn’t mind it all that much having to cook dinner for 3 people or having him join us on movie nights, but there were often times where I just felt like he was too involved. I never wanted to come between them. I loved and respected their friendship, and I just wanted the same respect for my relationship.
One night, my boyfriend and I had a pretty bad argument. I had planned this huge ski trip for us and a few days before we were set to leave, he tells me that he has invited his roommate and some girl he was casually dating, and 2 more of their friends. The romantic trip I planned turned into me tagging along on a boys trip. We argued a lot on that trip because he was ignoring me to spend all of his time with his friends. Then, he tells me to stay back at the cabin with his friend’s girlfriend while they go out for an evening on the town and to hit a bar later that night. I spent the entire night in my room watching movies and being miserable. I was fed up with being put on the back burner constantly, so that he could please his friends. I finally spoke up and voiced my opinion the night after we got back. Things got a little heated, and all of a sudden his roommate jumps in and calls me a jealous bitch. As I expected, my boyfriend did nothing. I went home in tears, only to get a call a few hours later from the roommate, apologizing for calling me a bitch, but telling me that my boyfriend no longer wanted to see me. Yup, my adult boyfriend had his friend call me to dump me. He couldn’t even dump me without his best friend.
52 Comments to Him and His Best Friend
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**crickets**
I can kinda understand where you are coming from. I had a boyfriend that wanted to go to Vegas with me. I had never been so I said sure. Then his roommate was coming along with his girlfriend and then another couple. They had all been there numerous times so I thought I would at least be able to see the one thing I really wanted to see, the Pirate Battle at Treasure Island on the Strip. Well, I didn’t get to see it. Why, because they had all seen it “a thousand times and it was boring”. We didn’t get to go anything we wanted because my BF was too busy kissing his friends ass and doing everything he wanted to do.
It is maddening. We didn’t break up over that BUT it was a miserable time. I couldn’t wait to get home.
It doesn’t sound like you really lost much in this relationship. The guy was immature (at least in this relationship). He was more invested in his friend(s) than in you. It was bad timing. Maybe his buddy was more fun than you. Maybe he just lacked the ability to be in a real relationship. I can’t tell you. What I can tell you is that there will be another guy. Many more guys. Now you know the warning signs. Live and learn.
OP,
I wouldn’t worry about it too much. You deserve better anyway. Just think, if it had continued, his best friend would have probably wanted to go on your honey moon as well…Assuming the two of you had planned on getting married, etc.
Like Brattus said, live and learn.
Yeah, that sounds annoying.
I had a very brief relationship with someone like this too. Our first little misunderstanding, he tells me how T (Tiberius? I don’t remember) would never treat him like that, how T is such a good friend…blah blah blah. I figured that they would be better off without me, and they could go screw themselves without fear of being called heterosexual. Moving on…
Heh, I put ” *crickets* ” earlier because no one commented for quite some time.
OP, that boyfriend was a mound of unbuttered, unsalted potatoes… bland and spineless and lacking in many ways. What a douchelicker.
Having his buddy do the breaking-up call just proved one last time that he was a total wimp.
Good riddance!
That’s what happens when you start dating a gay guy with a long term boyfriend.
If a guy wants to hang out with his friends instead of spending more alone time with you, it tells me only one thing…. YEP, you clearly need to work on your mouth-hugging skills.
This story reminds me precisely of why I loathe going on trips with my sister and her dickhead boyfriend. My personal favorite so far is the Christmas family trip from 2012. We all made arrangements to spend Christmas with some awesome relatives instead of doing the typical celebration at home. The plan was for my sister and dickhead boyfriend to spend Christmas Eve with his family (whom we like to call helicopters) and then all travel down together the following day.
What happened instead is that while waiting for them to show up, my sister had to call us and say that they would be driving down separately. We got down there at 10 am. They did not show up until 9 p.m. We found out it was because dickhead boyfriend wanted to run around town on Christmas Day, stop by and visit all of HIS acquaintances and friends and do a little drinking. Who the fuck blows off family on good terms to visit dumbfuck acquaintances from work and the gym? Lol. I swear to god, every time they are around, no matter what the fuck we happen to be doing, it HAS to become the “Krista and Jacob” show instead. (Names changed for protection.)
Anyhow, you probably are lucky you got away from that OP, otherwise you would still be stuck with a fucking asshat who thinks every aspect of his life is the most important thing and he totally would start pulling these kinds of bullshit stunts on you for the holidays as well. It is extremely rude to invite other parties to a pre-planned trip without consulting everyone else who is fucking putting money into the trip.
Brattus, I totally would have been like “Fuck you I’m gonna see pirates and you can suck my left tit if you don’t like it.”
I love the comments & the commenters on this site. Brattus, I live in Vegas… I love the pirate show, and the volcano it’s fun to see. And F them for not taking the time to check it our. OP, good riddance to bad rubbish. The dude sounds immature and/or gay. You’re better off.
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